awakening ⁂ is the hardest part ⁂ learning to

breathe ⁂ & be so aware ⁂ of lungs ⁂ to be

cognizant ⁂ of the body ⁂ its spine ⁂ & feet ⁂

differences & deficiencies ⁂ wiggling digits into

earth ⁂ & feeling the pulse of the world ⁂ under

foot ⁂ the world is not yours ⁂ not like this ⁂ its

gravitas is separate ⁂ older ⁂ than you can guess ⁂ & so

heavy ⁂ in this world ⁂ you are alien ⁂ & will never be ⁂

insider ⁂ you float ⁂ between bodies ⁂ disconnected ⁂

jarred out ⁂ of sleep ⁂ into gasoline ⁂ smoke ⁂ &

kiss of steel ⁂ then back ⁂ into world ⁂ of trees & pools ⁂

lithe sleek bodies ⁂ nightbloom flowers ⁂ thick loam ⁂ bright

moons ⁂ everything can be ⁂ & is connected ⁂ people & their

nature ⁂ you are not part of ⁂ that world ⁂ you

outsider ⁂ unbelonger ⁂ always un- ⁂ always out- ⁂ you

pray that changes ⁂ one day ⁂ you are angry ⁂ but never

querulous ⁂ accepting your lot ⁂ without comment ⁂

recognizing ⁂ complaint is useless ⁂ you are here now ⁂

soldier up & move out ⁂ into the world ⁂ both worlds ⁂

take a breath ⁂ take several ⁂ it will not ⁂ ground you

until you accept it ⁂ you alien ⁂ you otherworld ⁂ trace

vines on rock ⁂ climb the path to acceptance ⁂ if you can

warrior your spirit ⁂ jump & hallelujah ⁂ find place & mark

X ⁂ know a body is something you have ⁂ not something

you are ⁂ try to sleep ⁂ soundly ⁂ without fear ⁂ keep your

zest alive ⁂ & do not forget ⁂ which body you see through

GRETCHEN ROCKWELL (xe/xer) is a queer poet currently living in Pennsylvania. Xe has two microchapbooks, love songs for godzilla (Kissing Dynamite) and Thanatology (Ghost City Press), and xer work has appeared in Glass: A Journal of Poetry, Poet Lore, FOLIO, FreezeRay Poetry, and elsewhere. Gretchen enjoys writing poetry about gender and sexuality, history, myth, science, space, and unusual connections – find xer at gretchenrockwell.com or on Twitter at @daft_rockwell.